"...they will have made of the ridiculous a little religion, and out of Penguinity brought peace." - Eaton

August 1, 2009

Penguin patrolling beach

With the introduction of new law enforcement technologies, we've heard complaints that penguin colonies are beginning to resemble police states.

Several cases have come to light in which a "patrol penguin" has zapped an unruly seal with fatal consequences. According to one patrol report, a seal was tasered repeatedly merely for "barking too much."

Such incidents raise troubling questions. Since when was it acceptable for patrol penguins to resort to potentially lethal force on such a routine basis? Why has such a disproportionate percentage of those zapped been members of other species? Why aren't more members of the colony speaking out against these abuses?

It's as if the little creatures are losing touch with their penguinity.